The Very Uncouth Fan Slash Air Purifier

Tenley doesn't understand that stationary objects will not speak when spoken too. It took me 45 minutes to pick her up from my Mom's because she was yelling at the fan slash air purifier...hugging the fan slash air purifier....kissing the fan slash air purifier.....scowling...at the fan slash air purifier. "Buh bye fan!" "Big hug? Okay, fan!" "Ohhh kiss, fan!" "Hey! See later!" And this goes on and on and on till I've past the point of thinking it is so funny that I'm practically whizzing myself, and on to contemplating the use of a soaked rag to knock her unconscious so that we can leave.